Log in

No account? Create an account
13 November 2009 @ 12:45 am
stay tuned for updates... i'm serious this time, lol.
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: I Wish You Knew - Mariah Carey
23 July 2007 @ 04:16 am
eh, can't sleep. need to sleep, but there's stuff on my mind. i think i need to just be hypnotized into not thinking about shit that irks me, shit that i want one minute, and despise it the next...

you're probably like, nequa, what EVER are you talking about...honestly, it's that "same old shit, different day" kinda thing. i'm always complaining that i don't have love. the thing is, ii think i actually end up denying myself love in the end. i just don't know how to go for what i want. either that, or what i want isn't what someone else wants, and i let the shit rock anyway.


i just want someone that will treat me right, not just get into my pants. that story was NEVER hot with me, but for some reason that's what i am receiving from every loser i end up talking to. i really thought  this one was going to work out...slowly but surely we ended up on two different pages. and although i'm not happy with it, i still was picking up the phone and shit. like a fool, hoping that one day he would see the prized diamond sitting in front of him for what she was...genuine....real...and special.

HOWEVER, on a college campus? not going to happen...ever...unless the shit is really rare and the people are really lucky. i've been here for 3 years, and I haven't been that lucky yet. i've dealt with low lives from all walks of life, and nowadays, nothing surprises me.
people let their status and ego rule them, letting things on paper make them, instead of them making the things on the paper. they have the wrongest ideas about life and how it should be lived.

i want someone who is their OWN person...who if you stripped them of all their valuables and possessions, they are still the same person. i want someone who isn't afraid...of the public, of his friends, of himself,  who's only fear is toward God. i want someone who knows himself, knows how handsome he is without anyone telling him.  i want someone who makes me whole, someone who tells me how beautiful i am every chance they get, someone who appreciates me, who WANTS to be with me. don't use me as a security blanket, because in the end, i won't keep you warm. use me as a house of confidence, trust, and love. i want someone who isn't as fake as a plastic mannequin, someone who is real to the bone. CLARIFICATION: not RUDE and IGNORANT, but REAL. i want someone to show me off to EVERYONE...someone who makes me laugh at the drop of a dime, someone to tell me that i am everything he has looked for in a woman. i want someone to hold me when i need comfort, scold me when i'm wrong, but hug me afterwards, to praise me when i succeed.

i want so many things. but i have standards. if you don't have any of these qualities, you need not apply....
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Eden - Hooverphonic
01 June 2007 @ 06:48 pm
WOW i havent written in this thing in over a year....wow. well, i did miss you, live journal people. you notice how after a while friends you used to have are no longer on that friends list. mabey i'm corny, but i miss those missing people.

what can i say about myself now, i'm living a life worth living, i must say. i have love for life, love for friendship, and love for love. i'm enjoying the opportunities life has bestowed upon me, and i'm enjoying every minute of it.

right now, i'm at my bestie Dan Dan's house. we're going to make the best of our first night chillin since april. college seperates us, but home brings us together! hopefully, i can get some distilled spirits in as the moon rises :-D
Current Mood: excitedexcited
Current Music: nelly furtado - say it right
26 February 2006 @ 04:27 pm
yea, i havent written in a while. felt i shoud update for the 0-6.....in february that is. so yea, danie came over, lots of fun fun fun. i've just wen a busy busy woman for the past couple of months, interning for wendy, doing layout for the stupid paper, dealing with my cabinet-mates for SGA, oh yea, and doing some schoolwork here and there. no sleep is included. im too tired for anything else than my itinerary i just spit out. i have a headache, but i think it was from last night. oh yea, lots of drinking. im back, lol. i actually kinda chilled out as compared to last semester, when i went all out, and practically every weekend i was drinking my ass off. well, this semester is a little more serious to me than the last one. and even with all that drinking, i still made dean's list. but hey, i think im looking out for my liver this time around.

so yea, im kinda going back and forth with this freshman guy. he's a cutie, and he's from brooklyn, hehe. we just say hi and smile when we see eachother, and he gives me this big hug that makes me feel oh-so special, so i've kinda been on this lil cloud for the past couple of days. we met in early february, but it's like now we're finally starting to see eachother around campus.

ooh, piccies!

me before getting f**ed up (peep the shirt, lol)
Image hosting by Photobucket

i was bored!
Image hosting by Photobucket

aww, the top of my head's cut off, but i still look good!
Image hosting by Photobucket
Current Mood: geekygeeky
Current Music: coldplay - the scientist
19 January 2006 @ 11:36 pm
well, it's around 11:30, and my birthday is but so little time away. im too excited. this weekend's going to be the best one i've had in a long time. at this point and time, i'm too through and too tired. class has been killing me, and i just need to rest up. starting next week, i'll be working for WBLS, so traveling back and forth is really going to take a toll on me. i need to save my energy. well, im about to pull myself together and get ready for sleep.


here some pre b-day weekend pics of me n the girls.....

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

roomies for life!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

nyc trio at it again!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

jazze and tina striking a pose

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

look at my eyes, lol.
<input ... ></input><input ... >
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Sometimes U Make Me Smile - Floetry
19 January 2006 @ 11:02 am
it's been a while since i have written, again. im bad....i have a comp now so i have no excuse why i'm not writing. but anyhoo,


i am so excited, man. danie's coming to vsit dsu today, i just know that we are going to have fun this weekend. i need to, because after this, im going to focus on my studies. i almost got a C last semester in one of my classes. im still on the deans list, and i want to keep it that way. it's getting hard though, and it's because of all the partying and silly man business. it all needs to stop, and it will i tell you! im going to start getting 3.8 and above instead of a low 3.5. i need to set my goals to be high.
Current Mood: excitedexcited
07 October 2005 @ 10:55 pm
well, i didnt go home today. im pissed. theres a party tonight in the yards. im done drinking. i need to stop, before, god forbid, i get stomach cancer or something. i drink waaaaaaaay too much. imma just chill and have a good time tonight.

im done with that damn footballer. he's too much for me. acting shady too many times for me. oh, what am i saying, imma be up in his ass the next time i see him.....im so weak.
Current Mood: hungryhungry
Current Music: do it to me? - usher
27 September 2005 @ 07:25 pm
i have an additude right now. people are just getting angry and getting rude and it's unnecessary. im irritated because i want to go home(i havent seen the baby), i havent had sex in a month(i havent had the time), and at times i really feel alone. i hate that feeling. i miss my bff, but i dont have the time to call her, or she doesnt have the time to call me. i just need prayer right now. my brother hasnt had a good month, first a bad asthma attack, and these guys who dont like his school try to beat him up(and they lost!). im just so damn tired of drama and bullshit. i cant go home until the end of october, and i really feel at times im going to go crazy without my mom.

i really have an attitude. i just want all of this shit to stop. im too shy to talk to him, and i have the feeling that i will never get the courage to talk to him. im so pissed. i could talk to anyone else, but him. i could even tell a phi a man i liked him! what makes him so damn scary. not even scary, but what makes me so scared to talk to him? ugh, im tired of it!

ok, now i have a fucking additude! im tired of saying im tired. im tired of niggas jerking me around like im a fucking yo-yo. im tired of niggas trying to play me. even though they dont succeed, it still makes me mad that they thought they could get away with it. im tired of the lies. im tired of the rumors. im tired of the pimp game. im tired of the surprise girlfriends. im tired of niggas not saying hello, and they know they know me. im tired of niggas not having backbones. im tired of being tired.
Current Mood: enragedenraged
Current Music: all this love - el debarge
04 September 2005 @ 03:40 pm
well, it has been a busy week here at Del State. friday and saturday were partying days, so imma start with sunday and give a rundown....

Sunday - mmmm, pizza
My first SGA meeting of the year. we discussed the upcoming events of the week, since it's transition week for the freshmen. we had pizza and watched the vma's.

Monday - another orientation?
Since the stupid school admitted more than they could handle, we had a fourth orientation for freshmen monday and tuesday, about 250 students. i sat in the dorms, helping out which way i can and whatnot. it being 1000 degrees didnt really help the situation. the football team carrying ppl's stuff in did.
-Jasmine and Jen moved in The ELITE Suite today, we have the best dorm room ever!

Tuesday - no more loans!
worked in the Administration (admin) bldg today, all day, helping freshmen with their financial aid. very exhausting, but fulfilling at the same time. there was a "social" for the freshman orientation, but it ended turning into a party for the upperclassmen who were too restless to go back to the dorms.

Wednesday - can you say WTF?
it was a madhouse this day. about 700 new students moved in, at the SAME TIME as about 300 returning students. i held the doors open for people and greeted them as they passed at first, because they had the Alphas and the football team helping them. they didnt need me! but after a while, i started getting dirty looks from some ppl, so i decided to do some work. it was so lucky that the first car nikki (Soph. Class Prez) and i picked was for a room on the 3rd floor, in a bldg with no elevators, and it was REALLY hot this day. it was torture. We then had a "dinner" with the president of the school, even though he was no where to be found. later that night there was an "independence night" festival. its so cool being able to give contests and stuff. i have authority, hehehehe! but after the thing was over, we had to stay after to practice the different chants for football and basketball games, and we did the DSU slide () at least 20 times. i know them by heart, shoot!
- Ashley moved into The ELITE Suite today!
- My Cousin Tammy Moved into her dorn at Del State today!!!!!!

Thursday - M-E-E-T the G-R-E-E-K-S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh, this night was sweet. besides i got the reserved front row thing going on, we were hyping up the alphas when they did their step on the stage, mainly becuase mr sophomore, matthew chacko, is an alpha. then, towards the end of the routine, who jumps up on stage? none other than my a phi a boo, who came back for a visit. i was psyched! after that, everyone else was ok, but the alphas really did it up this year. the omegas did too, because this is their first legal meet the greeks in 2 years, b/c they were suspended. there was a little cookout at the plots, and i chilled for a sec, then i went home.
- My BOO TINA moved into The ELITE Suite today!

Friday - drop down and get your eagle on girl!
i had to chaperone the freshman ball today. i mainly enjoyed myself than chaperone the party, and i had a good with Ash and Chemera. these freshmen came dressed to impress, and i was happy. i mean, they were in prom dresses and all. guys had tuxedos. i wish my freshman ball was like this! i had jeans on at my freshman ball!

Saturday - that brings a 1st and 10.....HORNETS!
our football team had their first game in Florida against Florida A&M (FAMU)on the ESPN University channel. SGA hosted the game in the MLK student center. WE WON!!!!!! ooo, i saw my boo on tv. if u didn't know his #, u wouldnt know it was him, tho. his helet was on and everything, but i saw him! aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh! oh, there was a midnight basketball tournament and junk. it was aight....

and today......is a day of rest. i was supposed to go on a trip with sga to ocean city today, but i overslept. it did me some good though, i mean, it was just a trip to the beach, and it was not that seroius to go. all throught this week, since there are no classes till this tues, i have drank on 3 out of the 6 days, 5 days if you count last friday and saturday. im all partied out now. im in chill mode.....
Current Mood: relaxedrelaxed
Current Music: lauren hill - sweetest thing
13 July 2005 @ 03:43 am
eh, it's late, i have to get up at 8am to go to my first day of work. yay! i finally have a jobbie! i'm a damn fool, but i dont care. i really tried to go to sleep, but i can't. it sucks that i might only be able to work a couple of weeks. if the new editor of the hornet, harold, decides he wants us back early, he's pushing fot the first week of august. that'll suck, because my big sis might be coming then. if i wasnt getting paid, i wouldn;t be going.

im a little excited about decorating the suite once we move in. tina's my roomate. jasmine and the rest are suitemates, and we all have great ideas. black lights, coffee tables, curtains, the works. we are doing some major decorations. if only we could paint the walls...

i really want a boyfriend this semester. i can't be some whore who does just about anybody(i havent gotten to that point yet, but i dont want to...). i need something to entertain me in my personal life. i still think of djamal, and i hate it. i want to get over him, but i cant. it was actually easier to get over feeney, even though we're still friends and occasionally talk on the phone. djamal's different. wait, he's not different. he fits the formula almost all my past guys did except for one(feeney), and that's the asshole mold. he's not like the other m.b., but for some reason, i have this feeling like he's a dumb football player, who dates bodies, not faces and brains. but there's still something that makes me like him more. i really need to stop, but i dont know how!

eh, hopefully with my new agenda, i wont have time to think about him or any other male on campus. k, it's getting really late now. if preggers(mom) knew i was still up she'd have a fit.
Current Mood: awakeawake
Current Music: school spirit - kanye west